He didn't Love me Enough

He loved me. He told me often. He thought I was beautiful. He told me every day. I didn't believe him.

Because he didn't take care of me. Because he didn't sacrifice the way I did for him. Because he refused to give up his desires to help me achieve mine. Because he wouldn't put as much in as he took out.

I sound spoiled. I sound ungrateful. I sound unappreciative.

For years he didn't work. After he promised I could go back to school full-time. So, I had to get a job and juggle it all while he did what he wanted for himself.

He had heart surgery and I took a leave of absence from work to care for him. But I wasn't making enough to pay the bills, so I had to go back and abandoned him.

I had to be home to make dinner at night, so I couldn't afford to take a job that had more hours since I couldn't afford a babysitter. He was home, working on building his business, but I was not supportive. He couldn't raise a child and focus on his dreams.

I went back to school. He lost his job. I worked part-time while I got my degree. He drank in the garage and stayed up all night with his friends. He promised I'd have 2 years to finish my studies. He lied. I finished anyway.

He said he was my partner. As soon as I tried to rely on him, he shut down.

We went to counseling. He walked out. He told me he didn't love me enough to try anymore.

So I left.